Out in public with a paperback
Don't judge a book by its cover. Do judge a person by their book?
Most of us will know the phrase “don’t judge a book by its cover”. But book covers are big business, and designed to be at least a tiny bit judged. In the same way, I know very well that when I read on public transport or in a café, some people will notice, and form an opinion about me by the book I am reading.
So why not choose my books in a way that helps random strangers realise what a wonderfully dynamic, interesting person I am? Bystanders would surely feel delighted that such a quirkily distinctive human being like me exists, and perhaps, inspired by my example, acquire their own book for public reading. All while I’m innocently enraptured by my book, much too engrossed in intellectual pursuits to care about the opinions of strangers.
You can imagine that e-readers are useless for this minor PR stunt. If nobody knows what you’re reading, how can they admire you for it? The other week, I was reading Travels with my Aunt, by Graham Greene, on my Kindle. I had first read it for my GCSE English exam 20 years ago. It’s about a 50-something retired bank manager with a predictable and straight-laced life - and he likes it that way. Then he finds himself going on wild adventures around the world with his raunchy 70-something aunt, who loves travelling and also has casually shady cross-border dealings with ‘business partners’. My e-reader denied me the street cred of people thinking, “what a fascinating woman, reading a lesser-known book by an otherwise famous author”.
I remember it being the funniest and most entertaining piece of literature I’d ever read for school exams by age 16. Back in my day, most teenagers did not think literature was very interesting. (Although, having said that, my classmates were reading 1984 at 12 years old, so I read it too, to prove I was as smart as them. I don’t understand why they were reading it so young in the first place. It wasn’t even for school. Thinking back on this, I am thoroughly confused. Good book, though.) Reading Travels with my Aunt again two decades later, it still delighted and fascinated me, although I also noticed problems with how some characters were portrayed.
Our English Literature teacher had assigned us this book because, as she openly admitted, she hated analysing Charles Dickens in Literature classes. This immediately begged the question: if there were funny and entertaining books on exam reading lists, why didn’t we get to read more of them?!
Since humour changes with time, maybe we did actually read some absolute knee-slappers, without realising they were funny.
I mean, apparently Shakespeare was a real hoot back in the 1600s. Many people think Romeo and Juliet was not actually written as a romance, but as satire (sorry to disappoint). One analysis opens with “Do you have any idea just how unlikely it is that Shakespeare would romanticize the short-lived love affair of a pair of impetuous, suicidal, homicidal Italian teenagers from troubled families? Or how utterly ill-founded that interpretation actually is?“ This makes heaps of sense. I have nothing to add.
Along with writing (probable) satires, Shakespeare peppered his plays with such riotous one-liners as,
“I do desire we may be better strangers” (As You Like It, Act 3, Scene 2), and
“I must to the barber’s, monsieur; for methinks, I am marvellous hairy about the face: and I am such a tender ass, if my hair do but tickle me, I must scratch.” (Bottom, in A Midsummer’s Night’s Dream, Act 4, Scene 1).
Honestly, Will, what a joker!
OK, I’m not going to lie, I’ve heard better.
(For more unfair assessments of very old comedy, see here.)
I wonder what people would think if I read A Midsummer Night’s Dream on the train. “She must have a great sense of humour”, probably.
But since I can’t read minds, I shall share with you thoughts I might have if I saw people reading certain books out in the wild. This list of books is completely random. If there’s a book you’d like my (mostly shallow and uninformed) thoughts on, drop it in a comment!
Game of Thrones - I heard the books were better than the TV show, so fair enough, I suppose. But it’s pretty violent and erotic. What R-rated scene might they be reading right now?
The Burnout - Ooh, I read that when I was burned out. Is this person burned out? I hope they’ll be okay?!
A Midsummer Night’s Dream - GREAT choice, that one’s a hoot. Wonder if they’ve reached the scene where Bottom talks about how he must to the barber’s? Hilarious.
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People - Are they reading it voluntarily or did their boss / human resources assign it to them? Will they transform into a highly effective person after reading this book? Like the Electric Toothbrush Person? Should I read it??
Butter - This is SUCH a pretty book cover. I don’t know of a lot of books that have yellow covers. It must be a good book, then. Because of the cover.
How to Talk to Anyone - I’ve used conversational tips from this book and they worked! It’s ironic to be reading a book about talking to people on public transport. You are surrounded by people, but everyone is doing their best to avoid talking to each other. Oh, I just remembered that this book cover is yellow, too. Butter is prettier, in my opinion.
Romeo and Juliet - I wonder where they stand on the satire question.
Chronicle of a Death Foretold - Intense! I’d have to be in the right headspace for it, personally. Good for them.
Lord of the Rings - Oh, cool.
War and Peace - Wow, this is not an easy book to just casually carry around, at around 1 kilogram. They’ll need approximately 37 hours and 48 minutes to read it, so perhaps they’ll end up with 5% more arm strength too.
Travels with my Aunt - OMG did they also take English Lit with Mrs B??
Convenience Store Woman - This was an excellent book. This person must be a quirkily distinctive human being, much like myself.
And that’s that for now! Happy reading, friends.
Article disclaimer / clarification
This entire article is a joke. I obviously do not condone choosing reading material based on what strangers (or anyone else) will think.
I don’t actually spend time forming opinions/judgements of people on public transport, they are none of my business :)